I celebrated my 40th birthday with a girls weekend of wine tasting, a night out at a Cirque du Soleil-style dinner theatre, and brunch. I’d been looking forward to 40 and wanted to make a big-ish deal out of it. I spent weeks shopping for just the right dress, shoes, and accessories to feel fabulous, and a little sexy. Red dress, leopard print shoes and bag, gold jewelry. I had spent the months leading up to my 40th birthday completing 40 work outs to get in shape and feel good. I started intermittent fasting, and even did a 40-hour fast. Yep, I’m super type-A, plan everything, and love symbolism and goals. Checklist? Yes, please! Vision board? You know it! Also on the get my shit together before I turn 40 list: start actually saving money, improve my credit score, watch way too many hours of skin and makeup You Tube tutorials, and spend way too much on beauty products.
When I turned 40 I felt great and excited about my future. I started off with a goal of having 40 firsts in my 40th year. Yep, again with the goal-setting and symbolism. I had my first foot massage, my first jalapeno margarita, first trip to my mom’s snow bird house in Arizona…and a few other things that I can’t remember. And then 2020 smacked us in the face.
Schools closed. We started working from home. The courts suspended all trials. So, I stopped counting firsts. I stopped going to the gym. I watched too much news and dealt with the parade of horribles that I could not plan for or control by eating and drinking way too much. My clothes got tighter and tighter. I stopped wearing makeup. Good thing I spent all that time preparing to look good at 40. *insert eye roll*
And then, I ended my 40th year losing sight in my right eye and trying to figure out if I had multiple sclerosis. So, that was fun. (Did I mention I’m sarcastic?)
This year was rough. But, as Glennon Doyle says, “We can do hard things.” And, we do. Sometimes, there’s no nice or easy way. Sometimes, we have to just eat the lemons. And, sometimes we decide to write a blog about it.